Confronting the ‘Wall of Masculinity’ in Mental Health: Breaking Down the Barrier

While it’s true that women are diagnosed with mental health conditions more frequently, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention reports that nearly 78% of suicides were committed by men in 2013. This stark contrast raises an important question: why is there such a discrepancy?

The answer, according to some experts, lies in the societal expectations and pressures placed on men. In many cultures, men are expected to be strong, independent, and self-reliant. This cultural gender bias often discourages men from seeking help when they’re struggling with mental health issues.

Joseph Vandello, a psychology professor at the University of South Florida, explains that asking for help can feel like a direct contradiction to the traditional masculine role of being a protector. This role, along with the expectation of procreation, forms the cornerstone of many men’s identities.

David Vogel, a psychology professor, and clinical counselor at Iowa State University, adds that self-stigma plays a significant role in men’s reluctance to seek help. This term refers to the internalization of societal expectations and stereotypes. In the context of mental health, it often manifests as self-critical thoughts such as “I’m weak,” “I’m a failure,” or “I should be able to handle this on my own.”

Vogel suggests that these self-stigmatizing thoughts may be even more pronounced in men who are dealing with conditions like depression. The societal expectation that “men aren’t supposed to be depressed” can exacerbate feelings of shame and inadequacy.

However, Vogel also notes that men are more likely to seek help when their mental health begins to interfere with other aspects of their masculinity, such as their ability to provide for their family or succeed in their careers. When these areas of life are threatened, men may be more willing to overcome their reluctance and reach out for help.

In a nutshell, the discrepancy in mental health diagnoses and suicide rates between men and women can largely be attributed to societal expectations and self-stigma. These factors often discourage men from seeking help, leading to underdiagnosis of mental health conditions and, tragically, a higher rate of suicide.

Manhood and Millennials

Millenials and masculinity

These issues are increasingly relevant for millennials, as many transition from being in school to working and starting families.

More women are taking on breadwinner roles, which Vogel says should ease pressure on men. Conversely, he says, social norms have expanded more for women than for men.

According to Vandello, manhood has historically been based on rituals and traditions. Today’s young men face a unique challenge as there are fewer rites of passage than in the past. In generations past, military conscription has meant hundreds of thousands of young men have gone to war. That is not the case now.

However, recent research from the American Psychological Association suggests that men are still emotionally affected by both economic and social problems, both of which are still closely related to male suicide.

Perception, power, and control

Man with the daughter

Masculinity and manhood are perceived states; even if this is only self-perception, men seek to prove their manhood in ways that Vandello describes as “public and verifiable.”One of the aforementioned ways is sexual performance. Vandello cites losing one’s virginity and producing children as examples of verifiable and socially-acceptable proofs of manhood.

Self-perception of manhood is tied to sexuality through an individual’s sense of control, according to Patrick Noel, an American University student who works with Men of Strength. The group focuses on preventing domestic and sexual violence on college campuses.

Sexuality “intersects with masculinity because men are taught throughout their lives to be in control of all aspects of their lives, from their emotions to their finances to their family lives,” he says. “A perceived failure of any of these things is seen as a failure of their masculinity.”

This is why men are reluctant to seek support from their communities, Noel says, because it would mean surrendering “power and control.” Even when there are spaces, such as the home, where communication is welcome, Noel says men are not talking about their health and mental health issues.

He provided an example of two fraternity members who were both battling similar mental health issues but never would know because neither felt that they could speak up to their friends.

“It’s a constant reassertion of this wall of masculinity, as if we have something to prove to the entire group,” Noel says. “Really, I feel like if more men talked to each other, we’d realize we all have a lot of similar problems.”

More lethal means: Gender differences in suicide

The solution is not to win the tug-of-war, but to drop the rope and then use the energy you used to spend fighting yourself to focus on … what is really important to you in life.

And part of what drives differences in suicide is that men and women use different means to commit or attempt suicide. Research shows men are more likely to use firearms, while women use less deadly means — or means where they can be resuscitated. This is known as the “gender paradox” of suicide.

“The research shows that women attempt suicide more often than men, but that men are more likely to complete suicide, likely due to use of more lethal means,” Vogel wrote in an email.

It is possible that this paradox is reinforced by American accessibility, as suggested in a Scientific American blog by Jesse Bering: studies show that women are prescribed significantly more antipsychotic medications, and men have better access to weapons.

Other cultures worldwide do not demonstrate the same gender paradox, according to the World Health Organization.

Means aside, why do men go through with suicide more often than women in the U.S.? An American Psychological Association study suggests that suicide itself has masculine connotations. The conclusion, according to the study, is that men may perceive surviving a suicide attempt as failure. And in this culture, failure takes away what makes men masculine.

The Bottom Line

While women are more frequently diagnosed with mental health conditions, men account for nearly 78% of suicides, a discrepancy often attributed to societal expectations and self-stigma that discourage men from seeking help. This issue is particularly relevant for millennials, who are navigating transitions in societal roles and expectations.

The concept of masculinity, often tied to control and power, can prevent men from discussing their mental health issues, even when they share common struggles.

Furthermore, the ‘gender paradox’ of suicide, where men are more likely to complete suicide due to the use of more lethal means, contributes to the higher suicide rates among men. Addressing these complex issues requires a societal shift in the perception of masculinity and mental health, as well as increased accessibility to mental health resources for men.